We cannot get away from the palpable agitation caused by the current pandemic situation. While it seems like we’re on a standstill with people’s jobs and businesses on the line, the most important issue of health and safety remains to be the number one priority. The World Health Organization along with other health associations fiercely advocates washing of hands, social distancing, and wearing masks.
Ontario maintains the stand of allowing gatherings of five people only. The official website of the province regularly updates the guidelines, you may refer to this link to stay updated. Along with this, events are inevitably suspended. Unfortunately, that includes your long-planned wedding.
We know the frustration and helpless feeling of having gone through the tedious motions of getting the entire process done only to postpone at the last minute. Until there is a vaccine or known cure, there is no known sure date to reschedule.
Aren’t weddings about love and showing love to one another? You are supposed to spend it with the ones you care most about and if the restrictions can’t allow that, it’s better to take a step back and wait. Even if it weighs heavily on the heart.
It’s okay to cry. It is truly devastating. But, you need to take a deep breath and move forward. Here are some things you can do to put the existing conditions into perspective.
1. Keep Calm, Carry On & Do not Panic
Remember that you are not alone in these trying times. Not only is the entire world affected on a large scale, but thousands of soon to wed couples are in the same boat as you. Sit down with your partner and accept the fact that you would need to make adjustments due to the postponement. Make a Plan B, C, and even a plan D. Doing so might be necessary to cover all your bases.
2. Wait until they lift the restrictions before making big decisions
Don’t be brash about canceling bookings or asking for refunds. Also, don’t rush into deciding on a date yet. It is best to hold off any big decisions until the government lifts restrictions and you can assess what the situation will be like. There will surely be new protocols in place. It seems like the wedding scene might go through serious changes. Take things one at a time and take it day by day so as not to dive into decisions that you may regret later on.
The pandemic has financial effects worldwide. You also have to prepare yourself because that wedding budget you’ve so carefully put together might not be workable after they lift the restrictions. Think about some ways you can save. Determine your non-negotiables, determine areas where you can cut costs, and then work from there.
3. Inform your guests
Leading up to the wedding, you have painstakingly created a guest list of only the most special people to celebrate with you on your special day. Now that it won’t be happening yet, it’s courtesy to inform them about the postponement too. Regardless if you have a wedding planner or not, you must take time to let them know yourselves. Call, send a text message, a Facebook chat, an email, or go on Facetime or Zoom. It’s even better if you do it as a couple. You need not tell them the date yet, especially in these uncertain times. But, they will appreciate the act of informing them about it.
4. Contact your wedding planner & vendors
It’s imperative to talk to these people to find a common ground regarding the situation. You may need to look over signed contracts and vendor guidelines. Nobody’s to blame for the postponement. We all need to be considerate of each other. Respectfully ask to hold your reservations. Most suppliers will allow rebooking without additional costs as long as you communicate with them properly. All you can do is work together to find a common schedule amenable for everyone involved.
5. Check the validity of government documents
You may or may not have settled for a final date for the wedding. If you have moved it next year or at the end of this year, you may need to prepare for the possibility of renewing your documents. In Toronto, a marriage license has a 90-day validity only.
6. Focus on your health—physical, mental & emotional
These times are tough. The whole COVID situation is exhausting on the mind and may lead to physical manifestations. There is nothing else to do but follow the guidelines and wait patiently. Use this time to better yourself and don’t forget self-love. If you don’t feel like doing any strenuous exercises, just make sure you’re moving your body. You can do yoga, stretching, and meditation to keep your mind and body healthy.
Eat right and do the things you’ve always wanted to but didn’t have the time for. Finish that book that’s been on your bedside table for months or do some spring cleaning. Why don’t you and your partner learn new skills together like baking or carpentry? Look at the positive side of things and spend more time learning about each other as you wait for the time when you will finally be able to celebrate your union.
Despite these distressing events, there is always a silver lining. Remind yourself that YOU WILL STILL GET MARRIED. It may not have happened on the day you originally planned and it may be different once this is all over. But when it does happen, it will still be as magical as it was meant to be.
In accepting things you can’t change, you can go back to what’s important for both of you as a couple. Since the wedding scene might change drastically from what it used to, consider down-scaling your guest list. You may opt for a micro wedding or Pop-up wedding instead. In the end, the two of you and your marriage are still the most important. If you want to push through with your original plans but on a different date, that’s fine too.
There’s no way to go around the inevitable but it’s always a good thing that the virus doesn’t affect love and you can always hold on to it for hope. You will get married. Not soon, but you will get there.